Poem From Ellen

Okay so I was going through a box of old pictures and I came across a poem one of my best friends wrote...

Sometimes in life you find a special friend...

One that chases away your fears

And hold you through the tears

One that captures your heart

So you never want to be apart

Nothing can stop them

And price can't be put on them.

They go the extra mile

Just to see you smile

And just when you think

You're about to sink

They jump in

With a grin

And laugh at you for falling in

They show you life through different eyes

And truth from all the lies

A pictures of God's love

They're sent from heaven above

Nothing can part

A friends from the heart

Time cannot rift

God's perfect gift

A friendship forever

An eternity together

I love you Ellen thanks for being such a great friend!

One Hand in my Pocket

I'm broke but I'm happy
I'm poor but I'm kind
I'm high but I'm grounded
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed
I'm lost but I'm hopeful

I feel drunk but I'm sober
I'm young and I'm underpaid
I'm tired but I'm working
I care but I'm worthless
I'm here but I'm really gone
I'm wrong and I'm sorry

I'm free but I'm focused
I'm shy but I'm friendly
I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chicken shit

Good Song!

Seasons come season go

Season come season go

The world is changing with every turn

Only one will stay the same

It is God’s love and plan that will not alter

He knows what’s to come, and who’s to go

And even where the wind will blow

I may not know what the world has for me

I may not understand times in my life only I can see

But I know it’s all in His plan

God’s plan is perfect and bright

He will guide people in to my life and even into light

Throughout His wonder and might

He will show me where my footstep will land

He does not promise an easy journey but I will take a stand

There may even be tears and hardship at hand

Season come season go

The world is changing with every turn

But God’s love and plan will not alter

Friendship will change and even leave

Heartache will come making it hard to breath

Family will grow old causing me only to grieve

Season come season go

The world is changing with every turn

But God’s love and plan will not alter

Why Did God Allow Sin?

I once had this conversation that will forever be in my mind and has been on my mind a lot lately. It was between my grandma and me. It went something like this

Since you go to church so much maybe you will have this answer for me - my grandma

I said “Grandma didn't you know, I have all the answers”

She said "Good cause I need to know one of them, if God wants us to be with Him then why did he create sin and allow us to sin. If He is in control why didn't he just make us perfect forever?"

I looked at my grandma and I had to stop and think about her question.

I told her

If we were perfect then we wouldn't need Him as much as we do. I would just go through life knowing that He made me perfect and that I would always be perfect. I would never have to fully commit to Him with my whole heart because it would just be done. Since I am not perfect I need Him so much more just to get me through every day. I need to fully rely on Him and not put anything in front of Him or else I wont be able to make it all the way. Plus he knows that if I truly want Him then I have to show it and live for Him. It’s my choice and it means that much more when I choice Him for myself and not just because I have to.

She sat there and just thought about what I said....

I think we both just sat there and thought about what I said...

For at least 10 minutes

Then she replied

“Thank God I'm Not Perfect”

I have been thinking about this a lot lately and I have come to the conclusion that my grandma was a smart woman, because I wish things were prefect at time. I just want everything to go good and just want everyone to be happy but I need to step back and take a look at life and Thank God that I’m not Perfect because it allows me to fully rely on Him through everything hard or easy. I have to trust that He will be there for me and I can give Him my full heart because of that!

I may not understand it and I may not want it to be hard at times but I know that I am not perfect so I can fully rely on God. I may not like the rain but if I put my trust in Him then I will see the beauty that comes after all the rain.

Here is a verse from one of my favorite songs

I always liked grass to be green,

but I just can't take the rain it seems sometimes

And that's how it is with You and me,

I hate the very things I need sometimes

The Scene Aesthetic -- Yes, Even the Star Break

Alone at last
sleeping to help ease my pain
and i take it back
you'll never be this close to me
and i breathe in deep
it helps me to avoid this state
you've put me in
you've put me in

and now that i can deal with everything you've thrown at me
and how does it feel, to know that you could never fix the way we see the way you left us without any reasoning
without reasoning

I lay you to rest in my head
stored away to never return
i'll forget everything you left
back at home
please now i'm always looking back on a scripted memory

Life without a Bible

So at the beginning of the semester i lost my Bible... I was in devastation! I wrote on a box that life without a bible sucks! Today I was thinking, that sometime life with a Bible sucks just as bad... no matter what, if your a Christian or not life is going to have sucky days... I guess I just have to say that is the day might be sucky but the greatness comes with how your respond to the suckyness!

People Ask Who is Jesus?

People ask who is Jesus?

And why is He here?

The Pharisees don't know

But I know it so clear

Jesus lived and died for everyone

So that we could be near

All you have to do is open your ear

Listen to His voice speaking

And spend less time worshipping the mirror

Jesus wants to hold you and love you

He wants to grab the wheel and steer